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Dave's "WTF?!" Files


Posting Access:
All Members , Moderated
Welcome to the one and only Dave's "WTF?!" Files.
I think the title speaks for itself. Please keep in mind that each subject I will post about makes me ask "whatdafuck?!", thus voicing my opinion on how "f@#ked up" I think- well actually know, said subject is. I'm not asking for any rebuttals or comments since it is my opinion that said subject is "f@#ked up" and not you the reader's. But you are more than welcome to agree with my mighty intellect and astute observations. Meaning you can comment if you would like about what I’m saying, but be prepared for me to give you a verbal smack down if you act like a punk-ass knucklehead.

The page will be updated as I see fit, which is to say when I actually have the time to. I am after all a very busy and important man you know. There really are no rules other than I make the rules and can thusly break the rules. You on the other hand can not. And if you do I shall lay upon you a plague of crotch-eating rats to feast on your nibblits. So my rules are as follow:

• Rule The First: Dave is thy Lord and Master in this realm known as Dave’s “WTF?!” Files and there shall be no others before him.

• Rule The Second: What thy Lord and Master Dave says is the law. If thoust do not approve of thy Lord and Master’s laws you will be branded upon the forehead with the mark of the punk-ass knucklehead- “PK”.

• Rule The Third: Only thy Lord and Master Dave may post a topic in this grand realm known as Dave’s “WTF?!” Files. But, from time to time, some of this realm’s populous will gain the Great Enlightenment and be granted to stand at the right hand of Dave. They will be granted the responsibility to post “WTF?!” Files under the guidance of thy Lord and Master Dave.

• Rule The Fourth: Offerings of the Black Blood of The Earth, known to some as coffee, will be given as tribute to thy Lord and Master Dave. This offering may not be substituted except in the case of female virgins.

See? There’s really no rules you need to abide to. Just mine. Especially the fourth rule. Yep, that’s an important one.

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